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@Farmhouse_Schoolhouse

On the days when I am the worst version of myself, they give me grace when I need it most. This never stops feeling like a miracle. They grant forgiveness when I apologize. Sweet joy and relief! They welcome me back with open arms and open hearts. This is one of the things that makes our homeschool life together work so well. We are free to repent. This leads to grace and forgiveness for everyone at the table, parents included. Last week I had a horrible homeschool meltdown. It was so bad that I threatened to send them to public school! Before all was said and done everyone was shut up in their respective rooms crying. A few hours later we were back in the library, drinking tea, talking about what went wrong, forgiving one another and then finally, diving back into our current read aloud after deciding to call classes off for the rest of the day. It struck me later that night how so many things stay the same in our learning habits throughout our lifetime. My six year old will spend several minutes sounding out a word and then, one mere sentence later, act like he’s never seen the word before. This is enough to send my blood pressure though the roof until I remember that as a mom I am learning the same things over and over again too. How many times do I need to learn those lessons on high expectations or drawing deep margins in my schedule? Evidently, the answer is often. Sound it out Elsie... M-A-R-G-I-N. 😂😂 I’m getting better at sounding things out and identifying situations accurately as they come up, but in many ways I’m still figuring this all out as seasons change and birthday candles are blown out over and over and over again. I’m learning to look through those wispy curlicues of smoke and really see the faces gathered round the table as they change from one year to the next. I’m so thankful for our life together. Even on the hardest heart-wrenching days, there is nowhere else I’d rather be. It is my joy to live and learn and create and love by their side. ❤️
If I could go back to the beginning, I’d tell myself, “Before you worry about math curriculums or language arts programs or anything else, think about the relationships and consider their hearts.” I didn’t do this at first, but I thank God that He showed me the importance of it early on. If there is one thing I will never ever regret about our homeschooling years, aside from reading aloud early and often, it is the amount of time spent working on our relationships. I go into each new term asking myself if I am really SEEING each individual child. I think about their hearts, their dreams, their characters, their struggles. I think about how I can hear them better. I think about the things they cannot articulate yet and I try to find ways to build in stories and conversations to help give them a voice. I let them know, in every way I can imagine, that they have a voice and a place in our home and that we need and appreciate what they have to offer. I think of ways to speak life into them. What can I commend them on? What gifts am I seeing and how can they be nurtured? How can I encourage their hearts? I find ways to show them that I am in their corner and that we are a team. I’m not schooling them, we are learning together. What are their dreams RIGHT NOW and what steps can we start taking now to get them there? Where have I made mistakes and need to apologize? How can I work in more one on one time with each child so I can really see and hear them? The answers to all these questions form the foundation I build from at the beginning of each term. Once that foundation is in place, then I can move on to the academic. Because the truth is, who the heck cares if they can conjugate Latin verbs if our relationship is in ruins? Our best terms have been the ones when I have spent more time seeing them and meeting them where they are, than the ones spent planning for where I expected them to be without really seeing them first. My favorite thing about homeschooling? By far, it is the relationships we have formed. Yes, relationships are hard! It’s not all roses around here, but we are together in needing and giving grace, and that’s what matters most. 📷 @apoolephoto
This old photo still makes me tear up every time I see it. My terror of a toddler, now a young boy, gentle and patient and learning to choose faithfulness and kindness in the small moments. When he was two years old he was quick to destroy and dismantle, now he is quick to build and uphold and repair and create. What brought him to this place? (Aside from constant daily prayer?) Play. A chance, every day, to enter a little world of his own wherein he could be the hero. Stories. Immersing himself, every day, in places and alongside heroes who made courageous choices. Love. Living each day with the knowledge that he was and is and always will be, loved. Play. Stories. Love. Rinse. Repeat. ❤️ Give without fear. I see the moments adding up into something truly beautiful. All the older, wiser mamas were right. I’m so glad they encouraged me when I needed it most. ✨✨✨ "In the end, I believe, heroism is simply faithfulness, a moment-by-moment choice to do what is right – to love once more, to give without fear in the face of every challenge. Heroism is forged and known in such choices, whether in a blazing moment of courage or in the countless small moments of luminous, ordinary life." Sarah Clarkson
Per yesterday’s post when I mentioned protecting my kids privacy on IG: I want my kids to be able to tell their own stories in their own time and in their own way. While I love encouraging other moms and sharing as much as I can about our learning, there is a firm line in the sand and a veil drawn where it needs to be drawn. Privacy is important. Some of my children are introverted, private people and this is something I want to always respect. No names and no birth dates were agreed upon in the early days of blogging by my husband and I. As the kids grew older I decided never to post pictures of their bedrooms in my public account because these were their little sanctuaries of refuge for those tender boyhood years. Even before they could articulate it, I knew- no see through cocoons for them. The intimacy there was too great. I also resolved to speak kindly of them on all public platforms and if I ever shared about parenting struggles I would allude to “one child” or “one of my boys” or I would have to gain that child’s permission before sharing. My kids aren’t perfect, far from it. I just don’t feel the need to air my kid’s dirty laundry to prove my “realness” to others. Yes, The kids get to veto my posts. A good 70% get shot down. But some posts, they love and are excited to share. My eldest okayed sharing about dyslexia so that other moms would be encouraged to see the good gifts that come with dyslexia. This ability to share with others encouraged him greatly. On the other hand, We aren’t sharing a specific diagnosis for our youngest because he has not given permission. I feel strongly that I can relay my part in his story without unveiling his whole story. Now, I didn’t share about this yesterday to throw shade at or guilt anyone. These are decisions we’ve made as the parents of our particular family, believing that it’s what’s best for us and our children. For those that sent in questions, I hope this clarified it for you. I protect their time and space for a beautiful childhood, and I protect their stories too. 📸 @apoolephoto
When mom has been clobbered by seasonal allergies and her voice has left, the boys take charge. Morning Time was shorter than usual, but all the more sweet because the boys led by themselves. They were so eager to read to their siblings so I could drink my tea and rest my voice. What precious insight it gave me! I realized they are ready for more leadership during morning time and throughout the day. It’s amazing what we can learn about our children when we are silent and still. I’ll have more to reflect on next weekend for my annual autumn evaluation of or home, learning and character training. I’m always thankful for that time to refine my focus on who we are becoming. This morning felt like an early gift to encourage me before I even begin. ❤️ edit: I always show my boys everything I write before I post it. One boy approached after I posted this and said, “You know, the other thing I loved about this morning was holding pieces of morning time in my own hands and having it be mine to share. Everything we’re learning is for sharing.” 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Advocate like a Mother. 📸tender blurriness captured by my 2nd born 😭😭😭 T by @littlest_warrior Just because they can’t see it, doesn’t mean it isn’t there. It’s not behavioral. It’s not a lack of discipline. It’s not any of the other things strangers love to diagnose thirty seconds after meeting him. He is wonder. He is joy. He is love. He is feisty. He is brilliant. He is sweetness. He is wonderfully made. It’s not an understatement to say that homeschooling saved his life. I’m thankful to God for these years of grace through the hard fighting to help him grow and thrive. He has done great things for this boy He so beautifully, perfectly created. We are now on the threshold of a new fight. I’m ready for the starting bell. I’m ready to cheer him on. Let’s do this baby. We’ve got you.

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